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I am a psychopath who goes crazy all the time.
Did you know I throw balls?

it's getting closer now.

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Pastentries

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♥ November 2008
♥ December 2008
♥ January 2009
♥ February 2009
♥ March 2009
♥ April 2009
♥ May 2009
♥ June 2009
♥ July 2009
♥ August 2009
♥ September 2009
♥ October 2009
♥ December 2009
♥ January 2010
♥ February 2010
♥ March 2010
♥ April 2010
♥ May 2010
♥ November 2010
♥ January 2011
♥ May 2011

Creditorials

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Thursday, April 30, 2009

i predict i'll be out soon. i'm most probably the most inconsistent player in the squad and team. i dont know what happened to me today. i just feel that i tend to be more blur on court whenever i play with the u14s. i screwed up. so badly. aiya die.

first quarter today i played C. quite okay, not too bad. close to my usual standard i think. then second quarter C again. oh man, horrible. worse than horrible. all my runs. all my passes. way off. i was so blur. i didnt know where to run, when to run. my passes were underpasses. my balls were not thrown hard enough. i didnt go for every interception. i didnt read the game well. everything was just so messed up.

i dont want to get kicked out of the team. i want to play for u14s for pesta sukan. i want to go for malaysia trip with u14s. im probably the worst player in the team now. even noraida and ms rose thought i didnt look too good on court today. and they even asked me halfway through the second quarter if i was feeling well.

third quarter. i was damn determined to redeem myself. i played much better than the second one la. but there was still like a couple underpasses. and i kept landing on the wrong foot. good points were that i managed to tap some of the balls away and i wasnt that blur. my feeding into the circle wasnt that bad also. but still, the horrible-ness of my second quarter overshadowed my third quarter and first quarter playing.

sigh.

first time screwing up. i think there's a problem with me. just when everything's going fine, i suddenly mess everything up. and then after doing that, i have this fear of screwing up again nagging at me constantly at th back of my mind. then i would get very worried over this issue and evantually screw up everything i do. how wonderful. i swear one day im gonna die because im too stressed out from netball. then you'll see me on the newspaper again, but this time on the obituaries page.

yeah get ready for that. im sure alot of people will be happy to see my face there.

i notice my sense of dressing has become very different ever since i joined blaze and started playing for u14s. last time it used to be a huge variation of clothes every weekend, cos my sis would dress up very nicely and i would be spurred on to do the same. shorts, skirts, jeans, blouses, tubes, tanks, and whatever pieces of clothing you can think of, i used to wear them like every week. then now its just fbts/sports shorts and a shirt. its like my standard form of dressing now. i cant remember the last time i actually dressed up to look nice.

hm. must be getting influenced by too much netball.

shini is becoming a very very emo person now. all cos of netball. all the stress. sigh. but i love netball, what to do?

someone.cheer.me.up.please.

i want to talk to elaineeeeeee D: miss her so much la.

someone teach me how to play a good game of netball..
i'm literally dying here.